Just For Laughs
THE OLD PATHS: I liked the old paths, when Moms were at home. Dads were at work. Brothers went into the army. And sisters got married BEFORE having children! Crime did not pay; Hard work did; And people knew the difference. Moms could cook; Dads would work; Children would behave. Husbands were loving; Wives were supportive; And children were polite. Women wore the jewelry; And Men wore the pants. Women looked like ladies; Men looked like gentlemen; And children looked decent. People loved the truth, And hated a lie. They came to church to get IN, Not to get OUT! Hymns sounded Godly; Sermons sounded helpful; Rejoicing sounded normal; And crying sounded sincere. Cursing was wicked; Drugs were for illness. The flag was honored; America was beautiful; And God was welcome! We read the Bible in public; Prayed in school; And preached from house to house. To be called an American was worth dying for; To be called an American was worth living for; To be called a traitor was a shame! I still like the old paths the best!
On This Day in History
December 11 Events: 1816 - Indiana becomes the 19th U.S. state. 1941 - Germany and Italy declare war on the United States. 1961 - Melvin Calvin Awarded the Nobel Prize in Chemistry for his work on the process of photosynthesis. 1981 - Muhammad Ali fights his last boxing match and is defeated by Trevor Berbick.
Famous Birthdays
DECEMBER 11 Famous Birthdays: 1725 - George Mason (American Patriot) 1931 - Rita Moreno (Actress) 1943 - John Kerry (US. Senator/Presidential Candidate) 1944 - Terri Garr (Actress)
Kids Say the Darnest Things
Brittany (age 4) had an earache and wanted a pain killer. She tried in vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her mom explained it was a child-proof cap and she’d have to open it for her. Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: “How does it know it’s me?”
Betcha Didn't Know This!
The Federal Aviation Administration once did a study that found the average airline stewardess has a nose of 2.18 inches long. How many of our tax dollars went to determine this useless piece of trivia?
On the Light Side
A new and inexperienced waitress tells another waitress she is concerned about being able to carry the heavy trays and serve from them. The other waitress explains that tray stands are placed throughout the restaurant. The nervous beginner serves all her lunches successfully, and afterwards asks an elderly couple if everything has been all right. "It was fine, dear," replies the man, "but my wife and I have to leave now. Could she please have her walker back?"
Where Did This Come From?
SCOT FREE: This has nothing to do with Scotland. Scot is an old word for payment so if you went scot free you went without paying.