Just For Laughs

There is a dangerous virus being passed electronically, orally and by hand. This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, boss or anyone else DO NOT TOUCH IT. This virus will wipe out your private life completely. If you should come into contact with WORK put your jacket on and take two good friends to the nearest bar. Purchase the antidote known as Work-Isolator-Neutralizer-Extractor (WINE) or Bothersome-Employer-Eliminator-Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system. Pass this warning to 5 friends. If you don’t have 5 friends, you’re already infected and WORK is controlling your life.

On This Day in History

September 23 Events: 1806 - Lewis and Clark return from their exploration of the western US. 1846 - Discovery of the planet Neptune. 1952 - Rocky Marciano becomes the new Heavyweight Champion. 1962 - The cartoon the Jetsons airs for the first time. 1973 - Juan Peron regains power in Argentina.

Famous Birthdays

September 23 Famous Birthdays: 63 BC - Augustus Caesar (Roman Emperor) 1215 - Kublai Khan (Mongol Emperor) 1930 - Ray Charles (Singer) 1949 - Bruce Springsteen (Singer) 1959 - Jason Alexander (Actor) 1961 - William McCool (Astronaut)

Betcha Didn't Know This!

With 50% of its population having been educated at the post secondary level, Canada easily has the most educated populace in the world. It is followed by Israel at 45% and Japan at 44%.

Kids Say the Darnest Things

The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading. After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked, “Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude…?” After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, “I guess you’d be eating alone.”

On the Light Side

He stormed into the kitchen and walked directly up to his wife. Pointing a finger in her face, he said sternly, “From now on, YOU need to know that I AM the MAN of this house, and my word is law! You will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I’m finished eating my meal, you will serve me a sumptuous dessert afterward. Then, after dinner, you are going to draw me a bath so I can relax. You will wash my back and towel me dry and bring me my robe. Then you will massage my feet and hand. Then after that’s done, guess who’s going to dress me and comb my hair?” his wife replied…“The $%&* funeral director would be my guess!”

Where Did This Come From?

GET OFF YOUR HIGH HORSE: A request to someone to stop behaving in a haughty and self-righteous manner. 'High' has long been a synonym for 'powerful'; 'remote from the common people'. This usage isn't limited to being on one's 'high horse' but has also persisted in terms like 'high and mighty', 'high-handed' and 'high finance' and in job titles like 'high commissioner'. When we now say that people are on their high horse we are implying a criticism of their haughtiness. The first riders of high horses didn't see it that way; they were very ready to assume a proud and commanding position, indeed that was the very reason they had mounted the said horse in the first place.

Idiot Sightings

IDIOT SIGHTING - As a police officer I quite often found myself working a car accident involving more than one car that required some traffic direction. It never failed that at least one of the vehicles moving through the accident scene would slow down by me and ask "What happened?" DUH! Stay alert! They walk among us!