Sunday, May 26, 2024
Just For Laughs
The next day the first blonde comes running up to the second when she got home, "Oh no, I can't tell whose puppy is whose. They've pulled the ribbons off while they were playing." "OK, we need to find a better way to tell them apart," says the second blonde. After several more hours of concentration, they came up with the bright idea of getting different colored collars. Again, the next day, the first blonde comes running up to the second as soon as she gets home, "Oh no, I can't tell whose puppy is whose. They've pulled their collars off while they were playing." "There's got to be some way to tell them apart," says the second blonde. After several more hours of concentration, the first blonde finally comes up with another idea, "I know! Why don't you take the black one and I'll take the white one!"
On This Day in History
May 26 Events: 1868 - The impeachment trial of President Andrew Johnson ends, with Johnson being found not guilty by one vote. 1889 - Opening of the first Eiffel Tower elevator to the public. 1896 - Charles Dow publishes the first edition of the Dow Jones Industrial Average. 1972 - The United States and the Soviet Union sign the Anti-Ballistic Missile Treaty.
Famous Birthdays
May 26 Famous Birthdays: 1907 - John Wayne (Actor famous for westerns) 1926 - Miles Davis (Jazz Trumpeter) 1948 - Stevie Nicks (Singer with Fleetwood Mac) 1949 - Hank Williams Junior (Singer) 1951 - Sally Ride (Astronaut) 1964 - Lenny Kravitz (Singer) 1966 - Helena Bonham Carter (Actress)
Betcha Didn't Know This!
They have a petrified buffalo hairball at the Texas Ranger Hall of Fame in Waco.
Kids Say the Darnest Things
For our daughters 6th birthday we bought her a fish. We couldn’t help laughing when on the way she announced “the fish’s name is Sparingly.” “How do you know?” I asked “look” she responded “It says “Feed sparingly 3 times daily.”
On the Light Side
The aspiring psychiatrists were attending their first class on emotional extremes. "Just to establish some parameters," said the professor to the student from Arkansas, "What is the opposite of joy?" "Sadness," said the student. And the opposite of depression?" he asked of the young lady from Oklahoma. “Elation," said she. "And you sir," he said to the young man from Texas, "How about the opposite of woe?" The Texan replied, "Sir, I believe that would be giddy-up.”
Where Did This Come From?
REDNECK: To be a redneck isn't because anger makes your neck red at all. The term comes from the South, but it refers to anyone who works outdoors, especially in the farm fields, where after a while all that sun exposure gives you a very red neck (from bending over a lot in the fields). Since many wore hats that sheltered their faces, that left them all with red necks. After years of having sun-burned necks, skin just got darker, reddish and more crusty. So the term today, although termed for Southern farmers, can be another who works outdoors rather than in an office.
Idiot Sightings
IDIOT SIGHTING I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore." Stay Alert! They walk among us... (they drive, too)... they reproduce... they vote and I'm sure that many of them hold elected office.