Tuesday, April 16, 2024
Just For Laughs
THE OLD PATHS: I liked the old paths, when Moms were at home. Dads were at work. Brothers went into the army. And sisters got married BEFORE having children! Crime did not pay; Hard work did; And people knew the difference. Moms could cook; Dads would work; Children would behave. Husbands were loving; Wives were supportive; And children were polite. Women wore the jewelry; And Men wore the pants. Women looked like ladies; Men looked like gentlemen; And children looked decent. People loved the truth, And hated a lie. They came to church to get IN, Not to get OUT! Hymns sounded Godly; Sermons sounded helpful; Rejoicing sounded normal; And crying sounded sincere. Cursing was wicked; Drugs were for illness. The flag was honored; America was beautiful; And God was welcome! We read the Bible in public; Prayed in school; And preached from house to house. To be called an American was worth dying for; To be called an American was worth living for; To be called a traitor was a shame! I still like the old paths the best!
On This Day in History
April 16 Events: 1853 - The first passenger rail opens in India. 1912 - Harriet Quimby becomes the first woman to fly an airplane across the English Channel. 1919 - Mohandas Gandhi's day of prayer and fasting.
Famous Birthdays
April 16 Famous Birthdays: 1867 - Wilber Wright (Airplane Inventor) 1889 - Charlie Chaplin (Actor) 1927 - Pope Benedict XVI (Leader of the Roman Catholic Church) 1947 - Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (Basketball Player) 1965 - Jon Cryer (Actor) 1965 - Martin Lawrence (Actor)
Betcha Didn't Know This!
Airports at higher altitudes require a longer airstrip due to lower air density.
Kids Say the Darnest Things
My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo and replied, "No, how are we alike?'' "You're both old," he replied.
On the Light Side
A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk and if they have avocados, get 6”. A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk. The wife asks him, "Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk?" He replied, "They had avocados!" (If you're a woman, I'm sure you're going back to read it again! Men will get it the first time. My work is done here)
Where Did This Come From?
BITTER END: This is the end of the anchor line that is supposed to be tied to the ship. If you forgot to tie it down, your entire anchor would be lost overboard. Thus, you would have "met the bitter end.
Idiot Sightings
IDIOT SIGHTING - One of my friends once had his photos taken at a local photo shop. The next day he went to pick them up but the person at the desk refused to give him his photos without the purchase slip and the photos themselves were not enough to convince him that it was actually the right person wanting his photos back. Stay alert! They walk among us!